Tuesdays are free if you bring a gnome costume.

He was 100% into fasting with her until he understood that meant he couldn’t eat.

She was only made the society president because she can whistle with her toes.

I covered my friend in baby oil.

Plans for this weekend include turning wine into water.

The hand sanitizer was actually clear glue.

The snow-covered path was no help in finding his way out of the back-country.

Today arrived with a crash of my

The stench from the feedlot permeated the car despite having the air conditioning on recycled air.

Siri became confused when we reused to follow her directions.