MyDiagnostic

Twin 4-month-olds slept in the shade of the palm tree while the mother tanned in the sun.

Gwen had her best sleep ever on her new bed of nails.

He embraced his new life as an eggplant.

As she walked along the street and looked in the gutter, she realized facemasks had become the new cigarette butts.

The fence was confused about whether it was supposed to keep things in or keep things out.

He ran out of money, so he had to stop playing poker.

Tuesdays are free if you bring a gnome costume.

He was 100% into fasting with her until he understood that meant he couldn’t eat.

She was only made the society president because she can whistle with her toes.

I covered my friend in baby oil.